Sunday, January 23, 2011

Too funny not to share!

Olivia Waite, an erotic romance writer published with Ellora's Cave, has created an amusing movie about a man who wants to write an erotic romance.

It's funny because it hits so close to some real conversations we've all had with people.

Favorite repeated line from the movie:  "Ewww. No."

It's a must watch.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

...but some people are lactose intolerant!

Sex is like ice cream...but some people are lactose intolerant!

And when I say intolerant, I mean intolerant.  Close-minded. Small minded.

I have an alter ego who is a member of RWA - Romance Writers of America.  And she (we? I? Pronoun confusion. LOL.) has seen the intolerance erupt in huge waves from time to time.

Romance writers have spent many years desperately struggling for respect.  The genre has been referred to as "porn" for a long time. Needless to say, it's NOT porn, never has been, never will be. Romance novels offer so much more than "just sex."

But now, the hotter and hotter material, erotic romance, is taking off like a rocket ship - has been for a while now, actually.  Ellora's Cave was the first to offer the hotter stuff, and because they filled a niche, they've found great success where other epublishers who started at the same time, didn't. (It helped that women who wanted this type of material no longer had to face a pimply-faced, smirking clerk at the bookstore to purchase it.)

In an interesting juxtaposition, at the same time we've seen a huge rise in Inspirational Romance -- where you will find no sex on the pages whatsoever, and likely the characters will not engage in sex even off the pages.

But with the huge surge in popularity of the "hot stuff," there's also been a huge surge in intolerance towards the material, and towards the writers who create it.  Interesting enough, many romance writers who are angry at being looked down as "smut writers," as being "less than" in the fiction arena, have no problem at all in looking down at erotic romance writers.  I'm sure they justify it thusly:  "Yeah, but they really DO write smut."

Look, my flavor-of-choice (chocolate, rocky road, mint chocolate chip) may not be YOUR flavor-of-choice. (Vanilla.)  But that doesn't mean you should denigrate me for my choice.

Good erotic romance (and erotica) is hard to write! (No pun intended -- that time.) Bad erotic romance or erotica is painful...sometimes horribly painful...just like any bad attempt at a romance novel is painful.  Can you not give your fellow writer the benefit of the doubt? Treat him/her with the same respect you want?

We're all writers here.  Can't we all just get along? Support one another?

Stop looking down your nose at your fellow writer. Stop being intolerant of what they write. (Unless it's just really bad craft -- and even that is open to interpretation/subjectivity to a certain extent.)

They make pills to combat lactose intolerance.  Unfortunately battling the type of intolerance I'm talking about is a lot harder.

Friday, December 31, 2010

Review of Erotic Short: Ligne Claire by Riccardo Berra

There are different sorts of erotica out there, some of more literary than others.  In most of my reading, I'm more of a genre girl than a literary girl.

But I stumbled across this story today, and it captivated me.  Not as much for the erotic factors at play here.  I think I was way more entranced with it because of the main character and the choices she makes.  There's a decidely delicious, twisted revenge here...

The character draws me.  A middle-aged woman, ignored by her husband, who's having an affair.  A non-existance sex life of her own.  A teenaged child who drives her slightly batty.  Hell, this woman could be MANY RL women I know.

She begins an affair of her own.  Again, sort of standard.  But it's what happens after the affair has been going on for a while that takes a twisted turn.

Kudos to Riccardo Berra for creating a well-drawn "every woman" who turns out to be...delightfully twisted in her revenge.  In overcoming her boring, dreary existance...

In taking her life back into her own hands.

Well done.  5 Scoops of Ice Cream for this one.

Thursday, December 16, 2010's in demand!

Sex is like ice's in demand!

And that demand means that the newest technologies, etc. are always used on the sex front first.

I mean, the VCR revolutionized porn viewing. And we all know what the internet has done for porn.

As soon as I saw the previews for the Kinect "interactive feature" for the XBox, my mind immediately went to "dirty places."  And I wondered how long it would take for there to be virtual sex.

Uh, huh.  I really have to start listening to my imagination.  Because the first sex application for Kinect has arrived.  Check out this article:

Here's another article:

Now, I went to You Tube and I watched a demo of this game.  You can also find the demo video at the second article. Let me just say, not impressed so far.  Bascially it allows you to use your hand to move a disembodied hand around a girl's body.  Yeah, not so much with the stimulation/titilation there.  Actually, I found it sort of disturbing.  What's a turn on about a disembodied hand floating around, appearing to stroke boobs and stuff?  Maybe a prepubescent boy might get a kick out of it..

So it appears there's still a lot of untapped potential here.

What do you think? Does it seem that most technology gets "corrupted" quickly? Do you foresee a surge in these types of "games" for the XBox?  And will MS allow it?  I'm not sure if they have to approval all released games for the XBox or not.

Thursday, December 9, 2010's okay to indulge in it alone!

Sex is like ice's okay to indulge in it alone!

I mean, sure, it's great to share it with someone special.  But hey -- YOU'RE special, right?

And you know that "they" say about masturbation, right?  It's sex with someone you love!  At least, I sure hope that's the case!

Masturbation is a natural thing.  We all do it.  How can you tell if someone is lying to you about masturbation? If they say they assured, they're more than likely fibbing about it.

And that's because we're taught ( unfortunate too many of us are taught) that it's a shameful, dirty thing.

It's not.  You're not going to get hairy palms, or be struck by lightening. (Although I suppose if you're masturbating outside, during a thunder storm, and you're holding a metal object or near something tall, you might be courting danger.)

It's also important that you know how to pleasure yourself.  After all, how can you expect a partner to do what you can't do yourself?  Or don't understand what your body likes?  You can't communicate your preferences if you have no idea what they are.

The FoxNews article I linked in my last post mentioned that the sex myth: "If you don't have a partner, there's no point in having a libido."  To which I say, poppycock. (G)

As always, balance is important.  You don't want your activities interfering with your work, or interfering with a relationship you DO have.  (If you spend so much time pleasuring yourself that you're not interesed in engaging in sexual activities with your partner, then...that's not a good thing.)

But orgasm is good for the body.  Good for the brain.  Good for the mood.

So next time you find yourself in the mood for a little ice cream, and there's no one around to share it with...go ahead.  Indulge by yourself.

Blowing Sex myths out of the water

Here's an article on FoxNews about common sex myths.

The very first one is that interest in sex decreases with menopause.  Fox's expert says that's not the case -- as do a lot of women I know personally.  In fact, one friend of mine said that after being "forced" into menopause by a hysterectomy, her sex life is the best it's ever been.

I'm actually sort of surprised at some of the myths.  Especially "Your most important sex organs are 'south of the border.'"  Really?  I thought most people understood that sex, arousal, orgasm...all have a very strong BRAIN component.

One of the myths is something I actually planned to address in my next actual blog post.  Having some Internet connection issues, so not sure when I'll get that posted.

I'm posting THIS from Chick-Fil-A, where I'm happily having lunch.

Any surprises on the myth list for you?

Monday, December 6, 2010

...I love them both!

Hi!  Welcome to my blog, Sex is Like Ice Cream.

What do you mean, you never thought of sex like that?  Well, I hope to enlighten you about how it might be the same.  And different.

My name is Sassy Boudoir.  Okay, not really.  I'd hope no parent would actually put a name like that on a birth certificate, but hey, one never knows.  I am actually aka Sassy Boudoir.  I mean, jobs must be protected. They're hard to come by these days. Besides, my real name is boring.  Sassy Boudoir sounds like someone who would not only talk about sex, but make it fun and interesting.  And that's my hope.

She also sounds like someone who would freely admit to loving both ice cream AND sex.

There's nothing wrong with liking sex.  Loving sex.  Sex is a natural thing.  God made it pleasurable for a reason.  And we're going to talk about pleasure (or even the lack thereof) here.

So, once again, welcome.  I'm only just getting started.  Consider this post to be initial foreplay.  (Maybe not even that.  Maybe this is just getting a phone number.  Or deciding if we want to slip off to a dark corner for some fun.)